Are you self-sabotaging?

I few weeks ago I got a lot of responses from an email where I talked about how we are different today than we were when we set Jan 1 goals. And perhaps at this midpoint of the year, we should revisit why that is.

As we approach June 30 -- if you are anything like me -- you are either quietly proud of January’s list, or quietly panicking about it. Or, both. (Ahem, me.)

Here’s one thing I know to be true this week: both reactions are running the wrong diagnostic.

The halfway point isn’t a referendum on whether you’re winning. It’s a diagnostic. And it starts by asking the wrong question.

Here's the wrong one we are asking: Am I on track?
Here's the one I want you to ask instead: Is this the track that brings out the best in me?

My friend Whitney Johnson maps growth on an S Curve of Learning:

At the bottom: the launch point. Slow. Effortful. You feel like an impostor reading the map upside down.
The steep middle: the sweet spot. Momentum compounds; growth doesn’t just happen fast, it feels fast.
The top: mastery. Easy, polished, and, past a certain point, super f*cking boring.

Most people treat their life as one curve. But it isn’t.

Your career is a curve.
This year is a curve.

That hard thing you said yes to in February is its own curve hiding inside the big one. You’re a portfolio of S curves, all climbing at different speeds.

And, that gives us the most glorious and exquisite pain points:

1. Overwhelmed, in over your head.
2. Stretched, exhilarated, unmistakably more than you were six months ago.
3. Bored. Competent. Coasting.

Overwhelmed and in over your head isn't a performance problem. It's a launch point. The cure isn't running, it's reps.

Stretched, exhilarated, and unmistakably more than you were before? Cool. That's the sweet spot. The most expensive and short-sighted thing you can do here is to interrupt your own growth. Keep growing, and keep going. Mastery is around the corner.

Bored? Competent? Coasting? Houston, we have a problem. Because with mastery comes self-sabotage. And, this is the part of Whitney's research that is most interesting to me. Here is where you manufacture drama. You pick the fight. You mail in the project. Not because it's not working, but because you stop paying attention to what matters most.

(By the way, if you'd like to hear more from Whitney, listen to my interview with her here where we talk about self-sabotage and the moment I knew I had to jump to a new S Curve.)

"Who Cares? I'm at the Top of My Game!"

Yeah, I thought this too. But, once here, the only way out is down. Down to the launch point of a new curve, with all the awkwardness and impostor noise that lives there. That’s a beginner’s mindset, and it’s the whole game once you’re at the top. Refuse it and you don’t stay at mastery; you get evicted from it, usually by your own hand.

When a curve feels off, the four elements of consonance — calling, connection, contribution, control — narrow the diagnosis. Bored at the top usually means contribution is maxed and calling has gone stale. Drowning at the bottom usually means you don’t have enough control to make the climb survivable. The fix follows the diagnosis, not the other way around.

The four-minute version: one piece of paper, one lazy S. Plot yourself on the curve of this year. Now do it again for the project or relationship that’s been loudest in your head. The gap between the two plots is the data.

Your Second Half Doesn’t Need a New Resolution. It Needs a Better Diagnosis.

If your diagnosis is I’m at the top, and I can feel myself about to torch it, Wonderhell is the manual for jumping to the next curve without burning down this one.

If your diagnosis is I’m climbing the wrong curve entirely, Limitless is the framework for picking the right one.

If you’d rather run the diagnostic alongside me: https://limitless-possibility.mykajabi.com/limitless-course.