Here's why people really quit
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Last week I stepped off stage after speaking to a powerhouse group of women in optometry—smart, ambitious, mission-driven. And yet, I left the room thinking about one stat I just can’t shake: 70% of students in optometry school are women. This means that there is an entire generation of women entering the profession who are going to have a harder-than-average time finding mentors and champions, along with another entire generation of leaders who will risk losing these newly minted optometrists to a management failing that they don't even realize they are committing. Let me explain: I’ve spent 25 years helping leaders navigate the gaps between potential and performance, between ambition and success. And I’ve learned that quitting -- whether it's quiet quitting or vehement quitting -- isn’t just about external roadblocks, grit, or lack of talent. It's access. Access to opportunity. Access to power. Access to people who can say your name in a room full of decisions. It’s about relationships. It’s about the invisible scaffolding of connection that supports success—especially early in your career. It’s about the difference between being told “you’re doing great” and being pulled into the room where the real decisions happen. And most importantly? It’s about who your boss is and how they show up for you. What we found in our Limitless Leader report:We surveyed nearly 10,000 professionals across 113 countries and every possible demographic and every industry imaginable. We learned the obvious: people leave bad bosses. So, we focused our research specifically on people who said that they worked for a good boss... and what we found stopped us in our tracks. People are just as likely to leave good bosses as they are to leave bad ones… if they don’t have a strong relationship with those good bosses. Read that again. You can be competent. Respected. Admired. But if your people don’t feel seen, heard, or known, they’ll disengage. And they’ll leave. Not because you were a bad boss—but because you were never really their boss. That’s what leadership is. Not oversight. Not performance reviews. But connection. Mentors are good. Champions are better.Speaking of mentors and champions... When I speak on stage, I often ask: “Who here has a mentor?” (Lots of hands go up.) “And who has a champion?” (Crickets.) Mentors give you advice. Champions give you access. Mentors suggest you attend the networking event. Champions bring you as their plus-one. Too often, women (and especially women of color) are over-mentored and under-championed. And leaders—if you're reading this—you might think, “I support my team. I’m mentoring them.” That’s the work. That’s the opportunity. The best leaders don’t just hire the most obvious talent. They spot what others miss. They nurture what others overlook. And they build the kind of loyalty that isn’t just about retention, it’s about legacy. Because here's what I know to be true this week: You don’t need to look like someone to lift them up. You don’t need to share their background to open a door. You just have to see them. And if you’ve been waiting for someone to notice your spark, this is your invitation to start your own fire—and go find the champions who will help you fuel it. It’s okay to bang on the door and ask to be let in. But, sometimes the door only opens from the inside. When someone is already in the club, it sure is easier for them to invite you in. Go bang on some doors. And when you're inside? Invite someone else in, too. Speaking of mentors and success...Let me recommend a book I’m really excited about: The Compass Within. It’s a smart little parable by my friend Robert Glazer about a character at a crossroads who, with the help of a mentor, learns to uncover and prioritize his core values. Here’s why I love it: because success without clarity is just noise. When you know what truly drives you—your values—every choice gets clearer, every “yes” gets easier, and every win feels that much more meaningful. |