I Skipped The Selfie But Not The Lesson

Last week I had the great privilege of guest lecturing in Dr. Bret Simmons' business management class at the University of Nevada. At one point, I asked the students how many of them had mentors; a paltry few hands went up. Then I asked how many of them had champions; every one of those few hands dropped, and no more went up. Zip, zero, nada, zilch.

Do you have a mentor?
Do you have a champion?
More importantly, do you know the difference between the two?

You need both, but there is an important distinction between mentors and champions that we must discuss.

Mentors offer support, they tell you stories, they pass along wisdom. They teach you things. They are terrific. But, champions. Oh, champions invite you to opportunities, they put your name into consideration, they open doors. They take an active role in helping you make things happen.

I met Bret because, in addition to teaching at the University of Nevada, he also acts as the executive producer of TEDxReno. After I had been talking around the idea of Wonderhell for a couple of years, Dr. David Burkus called me and said something to the effect of, "Hey, I think you should do that Wonderhell idea as a TEDx talk, and so I told Bret Simmons about it and he wants you to open the show. Here's his email, and he's expecting to hear from you today."

To be clear, I was not ready for this. And so I responded something like, "Great, can you tell me about my idea, because I don't think I fully actually really know it yet..."

David, in this case, was a champion for me.
Bret, who coached me through my talk to make it one that has nearly 3M views (!) was a mentor.

(And, interestingly enough, you can turn your mentors into champions, because after that class, Bret invited me to come give another TEDx if I wanted, on the topic discussed in his class.)

Do You Know My Champion Marshall Goldsmith? You Should.

Dr. Marshall Goldsmith is a champion. Full stop.

But he is not just a legend because of his multiple New York Times bestselling books, or because he's coached most of the successful CEOs in the world, or the thousands of coaches he’s taught. He’s a legend because he lifts people up. He’s built a career (and a legacy) on making others better—on seeing potential before we even see it in ourselves.

When I first met Marshall he saw something in me, and instead of just offering advice, he opened doors, made introductions, and pulled me into the conversation. That’s what true champions do. (And along the way, they do also offer advice, often difficult to hear, but always helpful to accept. Note to self: I should do a future newsletter on three of the toughest pieces of advice I've ever received, right?)

Champions also drag you, against your will, to Broadway sing-along bars and buy rounds of drinks until 2AM.

Yeah, okay, so this is the point of the Hello Truesday when I am supposed to show you a very professional selfie that we took hours earlier at his very professional birthday party this past Saturday night. But I failed in the one job given to me by the woman who manages my newsletter distribution. In fact, if you listen closely enough, you can actually hear the sound of her hand smacking against her forehead as she reads this alongside you -- Hi Danielle #sorrynotsorry I promise I'll do better next time.

Not only did I not take that selfie with Marshall, it never even occurred to me to ask... even as I watched him get asked for selfie after selfie all night. The truth is that I didn't want to go to the bar. I didn't even want to go to the party. I mean, come on... small talk in a loud room with people I don't know at a work party on a weekend in another city? I'd rather be home snuggling my dog.

But I said yes and then yes again and then yes again. (Because remember last week when we talked about making your own luck?) So, there I was, at the party and then at the bar after. And, no, even as I write this, hungover on the train home on Sunday morning, I know that it's not wise to be sharing any photos (or videos, eek!) from that!

Instead, I will tell you something that Marshall said to me and several other 100 Coaches members in the cab we took from the party to the bar: "The most important decisions I ever made was to just show up as me." And, when he said that, I admitted that I couldn't sing, and wouldn't sing, and was petrified of this next stop on the birthday tour. He just smiled and, with a twinkly in his eye, replied, "You can't sing... yet."

And, oh, how we sang the night away! Song after song after song. Though, admittedly, I think the more he drank, the better I sang. ;)

Here's what I know to be true this week: There is nothing better for creating an inner circle of important relationships than being present and in the moment with people who matter most.

Choosing Your Inner Circle

I believe that every inner circle should have three types of members:

Someone to whom you aspire: Keeping an eye on someone who is kicking ass at a thing you want to do will provide you with a target to emulate and a bar to reach.
Someone who is a peer: Having someone with whom you can celebrate or commiserate helps you keep moving forward, not feel alone, and provide a sanity check throughout.
Someone you can mentor: There is no better way to finally get past impostor syndrome than to spend some time teaching someone something you really, really know.

Choose your community, keep the people whose actions, thoughts, and norms make you proud. Unfollow the rest.

It's time to switch careers if one of the TWO things are happening.

We like to think that career changes are all about strategy, ambition, and long-term planning. But let’s be real—it almost always comes down to just two things.

In my latest video, I break down what really drives career transitions, how to know if your work still matters (to you!), and the secret weapon most people overlook when making a big move. Before you start blasting out résumés or ghosting your current job, let’s talk about what you actually need to do to land somewhere that lights you up.

Watch Now

Do You Have Wild Courage?

What if being nosy, weird, bossy, and even reckless are actually your secret weapons for yours?

Jenny Wood, former Google executive, turns traditional career advice on its head in her new book, WILD COURAGE: Go After What You Want and Get It.

Through real-world examples, she reveals how 9 traits often labeled as problematic—Nosy, Weird, Bossy, Obsessed, Selfish, Brutal, Reckless, Shameless, and Manipulative—are exactly what make leaders stand out.

Jenny shares practical strategies for embracing these "uncomfortable" traits to stand out, lead authentically, and advance your career without compromising who you are. Get your copy here.

Speaking of Books — Want a Sneak Peek at My Next Book?

I’m deep in the weeds (the good kind!) on my next book, and wow — the theme, the outline, the graphs, even the keynote that’ll go with it — it all came rushing out in one glorious, hyper-focused, 27-hour sprint. I sent it off to my inner circle for their unfiltered feedback (because real friends tell you when your baby’s ugly), and the response?

"It's got legs!"

Here’s the deal — it’s going to be a long road from here to bookstore shelves, but as a Hello Truesday reader, you get front row seats. Want sneak peeks, early insights, and the kind of behind-the-scenes access that makes you feel like you’re in the room where it happens?